So when are those rock fairy's gonna visit us down south?
Why did the grim north get all the fun?
Another great trial on yet another fantastic piece of rock,
sorry I mean land. Had me grinning from ear to ear, what a rollercoaster
of self abuse to man and machine and had me feeling numb after
two laps not being able to feel the ends of my fingers through
cramp and unbelievable pain to the wrist department, though
Garys right wrist seemed to be ok! Wonder why!!!
That's it im selling up and moving to northern monkey country,
land of the Winnebago, gassers and betas and learn to rock hop
with a pogo stick up my jacksi.
Good first lap or so I thought. Was riding around with Gazza
the Gas Gas and also Kilham senior & junior and when I say I
was whipping all their butts section by section it was easy
to see I was obviously getting to over confident in thinking
I could win the inters route. The problem with this plan of
some fat southern shandy-drinking twat on a scorpa winning was
dashed! The plan hadn't come together as Hannibal wouldn't say
only realising at the end of the day that two northern gits
had stole my glory. Damn it!!!!! The gloves are coming off next
time and I will be taking no prisoners. Well that's what Gary
said!
Whoever laid out this trial did a great job; every section
was perfect for Gary to mess up and for me to sail through.
NOT! Gary was struggerling at every rock and turn and was pretty
pissed off by lap two, having damaged his precious gasser on
section 12 and falling off in the most awkward place. He even
managed to come out with some new excuse, which I have added
to the ever-growing excuses bible, which I will publish in paperback
and in all good bookshops soon. Its going to be titled 'Im a
crap trials rider, BUT! ive got an excuse' by Gary Roberts priced
£9.99, all proceeds going to the 'Rob Fleet I need a new scorpa'
fund:-) only joking mate. You know I don't mean it. Yeah right!
Expert route looked well suicidal; im well glad im not riding
that I thought. Over boulders the size of skyscrapers, I wondered
why all the experts was wearing parachutes. I stopped for a
moment just to ponder about how you would ride such a death
defying obstacle, and was left gob smacked when some spotty
young teenager came along and made it look like it was a strole
in the country. Picking my lower jaw from the floor I carried
on.
Not a very good turn out due to another event being held
on the same date down at hook woods in Surrey. Their loss you
cant beat the rocks and land up in Derbyshire. Bloody good event
and I thank the geezer that has made me make the effort to spread
my trials wings, a bit to late but never mind, and also the
Kilhams and the Ymsa for another great event. Only hope the
next one has me grinning and aching as much as this trial.
see you next time
Fleety
Ps: if you aint worked it out by now, that if I have offended
anyone in this write-up, I don't bloody care. So if you think
yer man enough! Gary's the one to punch.
See ya. Chow.
